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October 30, 2015

When the News Is “No”

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We started our adoption journey in January of 2012. We went through the agency application process and we were accepted into the Ethiopia program soon after. We completed our homestudy and dossier, and after $15,000 in adoption fees we were finally on the wait list. We waited and prayed for our little one and during that time we received nothing but discouraging news from our agency regarding our time frame. Our wait went from 18 months to 2 years to 2.5 years to 3 years to 4 years, and then we got the most discouraging news of all… The day after Christmas 2013 we received an email that explained the Ethiopia program would most likely be closing. I was not prepared to lose our child that day. We began researching our options and more than anything we spent time in intense conversation with God. 

Over the next several weeks we prayed and waited for more news. That news came on February 10th, 2014. We got an email from our agency that confirmed the Ethiopia program was most likely going to close and if by chance it did not close, then the wait would be YEARS beyond what we had ever expected. Basically Ethiopia was no longer an option for us. With that information our agency proceeded to tell us that they could not transfer any of our paid fees to their other programs…our $15,000 was gone. At that point we were not sure what to do and more importantly what we even could do. For a State Trooper and a stay at home mom the financial loss was a hard hit to bounce back from. We had been expecting this child and then just like that she was gone. The little child that I had prayed for for more than 2 years, kept a journal for to be able to tell her her story when she is older, the one I sewed a quilt for and saved a stuffed animal in my drawer for… She was real to me and now she was gone. I cried a lot that day.

The next morning I woke up and my devotions said “Do not grow weary and lose heart.” Again I prayed and asked God what He wanted us to do. I also went back to the questions we asked at the beginning of our journey…Do we believe God is calling us to adopt? Do we believe God has a specific child for our family? Do we believe He can provide? And the big one…Do we trust Him enough to take the leap of faith?

Adoption is anything but practical. If people were in it because it was the easy option they would give up at the 18th time you have to have your fingerprints taken (by the FBI, the state, the county, the city and Child Protective Services). It is not a fall back plan or “Plan B”… We fully believed God had a child for us through adoption and because of that we are chose to push forward a completely start over. 

We took a huge leap of faith, and you know what? God provided! With grants like Lifesong we were able to move forward, and on January 5th, 2015, we got THE call! We had finally been matched with a baby that was due in the spring. On April 17th we loaded into our SUV and drove across the country for 42 hours straight to arrive in time for the birth of our beautiful little girl. On April 20th, 2015 our daughter Esme entered the world and at that moment I knew why God gave us road blocks and speed bumps and detours; I knew why He made us WAIT. It was all for our daughter. People keep saying she is a lucky little girl, but we know the truth…we are the ones that have been BLESSED by her!

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Thank you for sharing your story, Brian and Jordyn! What a beautiful illustration of perseverance in the midst of heartache. We are thankful you did not give up on doing what God called you to do! 

Feel encouraged by this post? Have a story of your own to share? Comment below.

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