Tears of joy and tears of grief. Adoption is born out of both brokenness and love.
Going back to our adoption day video, 2-year-old Caidyn was handed to us by a cheerful nanny who had been our son’s most beloved caretaker in Tianjin, China. While our eyes were fixed on Caidyn easily coming to his mommy, the camera was recording. The camera captured the grief and pain written across Ms. Ma’s face, knowing she would never seen Caidyn again.
As a foster family ourselves, we are familiar with the grief when a child leaves the last time. This transition is bittersweet, we see the transition involving the broken and the loved. This was one of many motivators in our pursuit of international adoption and for our sweet boy, Caidyn.
Nearly 20 years ago a seed was planted in my heart to adopt. I experienced the pain of a wrecked family along with the desire to adopt from an orphanage in China. But I first had to meet an age requirement. Fast forward to my 30th birthday, my husband Brandon and I were pushing through the paperwork as our adoption story was finally unfolding. The dream of me as a 13-year-old girl was being fulfilled.
After having two daughters, Autumn and Brooklyn, we were certain another girl would be in our future. After six months of working through the paperwork for our international adoption, we experienced a difficult situation in our fostering world that forced us to let go of a baby boy to a biological family member. This turned us from seeking another girl to letting God lead us to the right child. Within days we were directed to our son’s profile.
We forfeited a considerable amount of money to switch agencies to continue our path toward Caidyn. There were moments when financial stress weighed heavily above us, but we stood firm knowing God would provide. When we spoke with Lifesong’s partner with Chosen & Dearly Loved, Catherine offered such genuine support through prayer that the monetary help was secondary to the spiritual support.
God made provisions with each and every step we made and we are certain God heard all the prayers on behalf of our family. God uses so many aspects of our lives to draw us closer and to teach us lessons.
Adoption is one that continues to teach us that you can find purpose in the pain, that there is healing amidst the wounds, and that love truly can conquer all.
The most significant God-thing in our journey was allowing Him to lead us despite what we had always imagined for our family. As stated before, we thought we were on a tract leading to adding a daughter to our mix. God used redirection on multiple occasions to lead us straight to Caidyn. I never would have seen his face if not for another adoptive mom who had seen us recently open our hearts to having a boy. Her husband was a doctor who had reviewed Caidyn’s medical file. She, along with many other adopting moms and our Almighty God, served as pillars for our adoption. God and those moms helped hold us up during the unknowns and the fears.
Once we had Caidyn with us, there was an overwhelming confirmation that He was our son.
Thank you so much for being a part of our story. Thank you for allowing us to be part of your mission. Thank you for telling our story to others. Thank you for encouraging families in this process. Thank you for having a heart for this ministry. We appreciate you and every single hand that touches the work behind Lifesong.
YOU are integral to the story. Thank you.
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